After I wrote Part I of the infertility blog, someone messaged me and said something that I wish I had been told sooner. It was a mantra that she repeated to her self while she was TTC, “in today’s society it’s almost impossible not to get pregnant if you really want it.” It’s a comforting thought. Now of course there are extenuating circumstances, and not everyone’s situation is the same. But there are resources, options, and support out there.

 As I was preparing for round two of my IUI process, I was determined to make it work this time. I thought, enough is enough already. I’m not going to feel sad or sorry, but I will take matters into my own hands. Ultimately, I found it easy to feel discouraged. But I also found it more empowering to look for solutions and feel like I’m getting 1 step closer to what I wanted.

I made it my mission to work on my self: Mind, Body, & Soul.

I really needed to understand my emotions and be able to talk about this part of my life that I really longed for. The only safe space that I found this type of comfort in was at Moonshine Co. I can’t say enough amazing things about how much Corina Crysler & the other practitioners helped me during this ‘journey’. I didn’t even realize how much I was suppressing my emotions which in turn wasn’t leaving space in the womb for a baby to grow. This might sound silly to some but it wasn’t until I released these feelings that I was finally able to feel like I’m truly ready. Trying to conceive becomes such a robotic and regimented task after a while, that you almost lose your self in it.

Here are my recommendations for the Mind & Soul portion:

• Go see Corina and do a 1:1 natal chart reading with her.
• Do a moon workshop. I wrote in my journal 5X/week to really help me manifest what my feelings were and what I wanted the outcome to be. This is beneficial in every part of your life, not just TTC.
   (I’ll do a more detailed blog about this)
• Book a session with Emily Barrie @ Moonshine
• Most importantly, be honest with your self and what you want. 

Emily Barrie said something to me that I couldn’t shake. She asked me what’s a creative outlet that I use. I said, usually interior design or fashion. Then she asked how do I start designing a space or putting together an outfit? I said, that I usually find one piece that I love so much, and I work my whole outfit or space around that one item. She said, “well that’s how you have to envision your baby. As if the baby already exists, and start planning your hypothetical space around it. Allow your self to believe that you are a mother.”
Now I’m not delusional and making my self believe that I have a child when I don’t.

But, it was a simple statement that changed everything for me. Up until that point, I wouldn’t allow my self to get excited or even to accept that one day I could be a mom. Acceptance was key.

So, my mind & soul were feeling a lot better. I was taking things easy, spending time with people who truly loved me and who I loved back. I rejected anything or anyone that caused toxic emotions or didn’t have my best interest at heart.

The Body:

As most of you know I became obsessed with Pilates, and how it helped to calm my mind, but strengthen my body without raising my cortisol. More about that in my Pilates blog post. It’s definitely a form of fitness that I highly recommend for women who live hectic lives and have a hard time turning off their brains from the daily routines and to-do lists.

My last stop was a BIE check with Balanced by Kayla. BIE is a way to balance your hormones or to check what hormones your body may be rejecting. (Kayla explains all of this much better, check out her page).
After we did the test, we noticed that I was rejecting HCG (pregnancy hormone), Estrogen, & Progesterone. All of these are so crucial to getting pregnant and maintaining your pregnancy. After 1 session with Kayla, she balanced me for those three.
When we retested, I was FINE! My body was starting to accept these hormones.

I finally felt equipped to start the second round of Gonal-F injections.

To be continued in Part II…. Then I swear that’s it.

Always,

Unik